ninehertz

1. • Pete
   • Hello!
     
     We have come up with a plan for doing a regular feature(tte) for ninehertz - a standard set of questions (probably 9) which we will set to a band, and publish the answers with a biography bit about the band also. It will be used mainly (or initially) for bands on the forum and will hopefully reinvigorate our "Articles" section, and also take the place of the Band Info thread in the forums which was great to begin with but not kept up.
     
     The plan is that a new one will be done regularly (eg fortnightly) - with quick turnaround due to the standardised questions and format. I imagine it being like "The Last Word" at the back pages of old school Kerrangs or that type of thing.
     
     What I am asking for now is suggestions for the questions we would use - while we will to start with focus on bands connected with the forum, we do not want them to be forum-in-joke cliquey, but other than all suggestions welcome. They can be quirky, or just straight up - the main thing is that the answer would be something people would be interesting to read.
     
     Please post any suggestions here and we'll pick out the best 9 (or however many we go for) soon and start it going.
     
     One other thing - we'd love suggestions for is a name for the series of interviews - one which people will be able to identify as the running feature of the site.
     
     Thanks for any help you can give.
   • [11:25 on 03/05/11]
2. • Mazz
   • Bum notes
     
     
     Q1. If you were to change the name your band what would you call it?
     Q2. Do you write for Friday nights or Monday mornings…and why?
     Q3. Do any of your band still wear “Heavy Metal T-shirts” and if so what age should this stop?
     Q4. What do you like and dislike about the 21st Century?
     Q5. If your band could score a film what film would it be..and WHY this film?
     Q6. What’s the best chorus you have heard?
     Q7. Have you ever paid to play?
     Q8. What the meaning of life?
     Q9. Who is mightier...Gandalf or Merlin?
     
     
     No worries Pete
     
   • [12:48 on 03/05/11]
3. • Ollie
   • Nine Hurts
     
     1) Where did you get your band name and why? Is your band name actually shit?
     2) Which is the cooler thing to write songs about; bikes/cars, sex, drinking or dragons?
     3) What would be the ultimate festival line-up for your band to play?
     4) Keyboards should be seen and not heard...discuss?
     5) What is your most embarrassing gig moment?
     6) Every band claims their home town is shit to play, how shit is yours and why?
     7) How many drinks is it acceptable to consume before you go on stage?
     8) Who would win in a fight, Lemmy or Keith Richards?
     9) Describe your band in 9 words.
     
     Any of these questions could be replaced with...Which member of your band is the biggest cunt?
     [Edited by Ollie at 13:16 on 03/05/11]
   • [13:11 on 03/05/11]
4. • bad admiral
   • Ollie says:

     
     Any of these questions could be replaced with...Which member of your band is the biggest cunt?
     
     
     haha! classic! good one ol!
     
     1) which band member would you eat first if you were stuck on a desert island?
     2) which band member would win in a fight?
     3) without incriminating yourself too much, what substances fuel your creative juices?
     4) why is marmalade not called orange jam?
     5) set your music player to shuffle - what are the first 5 tracks that pop up? no cheating!
     6) what's the punchline to your best joke?
     7) beard or moustache?
     8) £1 million in yr bank - what gets bought?
     9) with the exception of your instrument, what can't you go into the studio/onstage without?
     
     i know that sounds strangely formal, like english isn't my first language, but never mind.
     
     
   • [19:38 on 03/05/11]
5. • alan
   • How many Xzibits would Xzibit exhibit if Xzibit could exhibit Xzibits?
   • [20:26 on 03/05/11]
6. • basstard
   • 1) Describe your band to your mum in terms she could understand.
     2) What would your band sound like if Black Sabbath had never existed?
     3) Are you old enough to know better or too young to care?
     4) Who or what is your band's secret weapon?
     5) Is the band a democracy or a dictatorship- who calls the shots and who eats the shit?
     6) Where do you see your band in 5 years' time?
     7) You are offered £100,000 by Alan Sugar to do a one-off tribute act gig in full costume for his birthday party. Do you do it as Kiss, Manowar, Motley Crue or Gorgoroth?
     8) Which actors would play you all in the biopic of your band?
     9) You can only pick two of the following three options, give your reasons why; a) sex, b) drugs, c) rock'n'roll
   • [12:24 on 05/05/11]
7. • Donny
   • Some fanastic questions there boys!
     
     
   • [15:31 on 05/05/11]
8. • mike
   • I think we'll definitely be using some of these, particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand, I still can't do that about most bands I listen to, same goes for my dad, his reference points stop in about 1980.
   • [15:51 on 05/05/11]
9. • Mazz
   • mike says:

     I think we'll definitely be using some of these, particularly like this one. "Q9. Who is mightier...Gandalf or Merlin?"
     
     
     Cheers Mike.
   • [18:02 on 05/05/11]
10. • mike
    • Ha! That may cause some civil war in the scene.
    • [08:39 on 06/05/11]
11. • bazzathespaz
    • mike says:

      particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand
      
      I recently tried to explain my band to a lady at work who is about my mum's age. Here's how it went down.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me (trying to be broad as possible): Fast heavy metal
      Her: Oh right, you mean like Alice Cooper?
      Me (wishing I could say yes): Quite a bit heavier and faster than Alice Cooper
      Her (getting confused): Oh right. Who would you say it's like then?
      Me (trying not to be patronising): It would probably be easier if I showed you what I mean
      Her (wide-eyed in terror as I play her a track): Ooooh! I bet he has a sore throat after shouting like that.
    • [11:44 on 06/05/11]
12. • Mazz
    • bazzathespaz says:

      mike says:

      particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand

      
      I recently tried to explain my band to a lady at work who is about my mum's age. Here's how it went down.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me (trying to be broad as possible): Fast heavy metal
      Her: Oh right, you mean like Alice Cooper?
      Me (wishing I could say yes): Quite a bit heavier and faster than Alice Cooper
      Her (getting confused): Oh right. Who would you say it's like then?
      Me (trying not to be patronising): It would probably be easier if I showed you what I mean
      Her (wide-eyed in terror as I play her a track): Ooooh! I bet he has a sore throat after shouting like that.
      
      
      Don't even bother trying...I'm a real cunt these days.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me: yeaahhhhhh....*Walk off*
    • [11:49 on 06/05/11]
13. • Mazz
    • ..and another thing...my lady's father was AMAZED that I had some Motown AND classical music CDs..HE WAS AMAZED.
      
      
    • [11:51 on 06/05/11]
14. • alan
    • My parents are fine with general terms like hardcore, stoner, doom, death metal, thrash etc, they'd probably get a bit confused by crust, math and things like that.
    • [11:54 on 06/05/11]
15. • alan
    • Mazz says:

      bazzathespaz says:

      mike says:

      particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand

      
      I recently tried to explain my band to a lady at work who is about my mum's age. Here's how it went down.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me (trying to be broad as possible): Fast heavy metal
      Her: Oh right, you mean like Alice Cooper?
      Me (wishing I could say yes): Quite a bit heavier and faster than Alice Cooper
      Her (getting confused): Oh right. Who would you say it's like then?
      Me (trying not to be patronising): It would probably be easier if I showed you what I mean
      Her (wide-eyed in terror as I play her a track): Ooooh! I bet he has a sore throat after shouting like that.

      
      
      Don't even bother trying...I'm a real cunt these days.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me: yeaahhhhhh....*Walk off*
      
      
      I need to introduce my 'rents to the radical musical stylings of Groan, I think they may like.
    • [11:59 on 06/05/11]
16. • Mazz
    • Mazz says:

      ..and another thing...my lady's father was AMAZED that I had some Motown AND classical music CDs..HE WAS AMAZED.
      
      
      
      
      ..and another thing...I'm AMAZED that no one has kicked him in BIG JOHN BIG BALLS yet.
    • [12:02 on 06/05/11]
17. • Mazz
    • alan says:

      Mazz says:

      bazzathespaz says:

      mike says:

      particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand

      
      I recently tried to explain my band to a lady at work who is about my mum's age. Here's how it went down.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me (trying to be broad as possible): Fast heavy metal
      Her: Oh right, you mean like Alice Cooper?
      Me (wishing I could say yes): Quite a bit heavier and faster than Alice Cooper
      Her (getting confused): Oh right. Who would you say it's like then?
      Me (trying not to be patronising): It would probably be easier if I showed you what I mean
      Her (wide-eyed in terror as I play her a track): Ooooh! I bet he has a sore throat after shouting like that.

      
      
      Don't even bother trying...I'm a real cunt these days.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me: yeaahhhhhh....*Walk off*

      
      
      I need to introduce my 'rents to the radical musical stylings of Groan, I think they may like.
      
      
      Or course they would. I can talk to them on the phone if you like?
    • [12:02 on 06/05/11]
18. • alan
    • Mazz says:

      alan says:

      Mazz says:

      bazzathespaz says:

      mike says:

      particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand

      
      I recently tried to explain my band to a lady at work who is about my mum's age. Here's how it went down.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me (trying to be broad as possible): Fast heavy metal
      Her: Oh right, you mean like Alice Cooper?
      Me (wishing I could say yes): Quite a bit heavier and faster than Alice Cooper
      Her (getting confused): Oh right. Who would you say it's like then?
      Me (trying not to be patronising): It would probably be easier if I showed you what I mean
      Her (wide-eyed in terror as I play her a track): Ooooh! I bet he has a sore throat after shouting like that.

      
      
      Don't even bother trying...I'm a real cunt these days.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me: yeaahhhhhh....*Walk off*

      
      
      I need to introduce my 'rents to the radical musical stylings of Groan, I think they may like.

      
      
      Or course they would. I can talk to them on the phone if you like?
      
      
      Yeeah, do introductions for each track. Talk about the musical torment that inspired the lyrics etc.
    • [12:05 on 06/05/11]
19. • bazzathespaz
    • Mazz says:

      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me: yeaahhhhhh....*Walk off*
      
      ...to the Shaft theme tune
    • [12:06 on 06/05/11]
20. • Ollie
    • Mazz says:

      alan says:

      Mazz says:

      bazzathespaz says:

      mike says:

      particularly like the one where you have to describe your band in terms your mum would understand

      
      I recently tried to explain my band to a lady at work who is about my mum's age. Here's how it went down.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me (trying to be broad as possible): Fast heavy metal
      Her: Oh right, you mean like Alice Cooper?
      Me (wishing I could say yes): Quite a bit heavier and faster than Alice Cooper
      Her (getting confused): Oh right. Who would you say it's like then?
      Me (trying not to be patronising): It would probably be easier if I showed you what I mean
      Her (wide-eyed in terror as I play her a track): Ooooh! I bet he has a sore throat after shouting like that.

      
      
      Don't even bother trying...I'm a real cunt these days.
      
      Her: Oh so you're in a band? What sort of music is it.
      Me: yeaahhhhhh....*Walk off*

      
      
      I need to introduce my 'rents to the radical musical stylings of Groan, I think they may like.

      
      
      Or course they would. I can talk to them on the phone if you like?
      
      
      My dad is a huge Rolling Stones and blues...he's very cool!!!
    • [12:09 on 06/05/11]

Forums - Music Discussion and Promotion - Interviews for ninehertz - help needed!