ninehertz

1. • Tim Holehouse
   • Guy at my work said of my set at the work gig... "I know its all rock and roll to swear (and I'm not being a prude), but there's no need for it Tim, Michael Jackson didn't have to swear and he was a great artist" Me "Yeah but he touch young boys wangs..." Cue his jaw dropping to the floor. Ha ha!
     
     Between that and shouting out "fanny flaps" rather louder than I meant to during the christmas meal quiz I think its be a sucessful Christmas period of monkey boys raise getting vetoed. Opps!
   • [08:43 on 22/12/09]
2. • bad admiral
   • you don't need to worry about your raise being vetoed because of xmas party hi-jinx compared to the shit i got up to.
     
     
   • [12:37 on 22/12/09]
3. • pull-my-plonker
   • bad admiral says:

     you don't need to worry about your raise being vetoed because of xmas party hi-jinx compared to the shit i got up to.
     
     
     
     
     The mind explodes...
     
     Good on you Tim, although Gary Glitter never swore either, and he was a great artist...
   • [13:10 on 22/12/09]
4. • Tim Holehouse
   • he was the peedo of the gang!
     
     Rich did you tea bag don again at your christmas party?
     
     I did also find out one of our managers is a big fan of screamo... he's in his late 40's that's pretty cool. Said burn him a Cd of the classics... I don't mean this kiddy screamo by the way.
   • [13:13 on 22/12/09]
5. • bad admiral
   • i got my balls out and governed don with them in front of my area manager, whose face i then attempted to lick, and in failing to do this, i showed her my bum. i dropped about 8 glasses, dry-humped my boss, kissed a tranny, blacked out for 5 hours, woke up with a sore arse and a wallet full of money, bummed don in front of his boss, whored out my nipples, dressed as a HEAVY GYPSIE/sparkly vampire, lost some headphones, told my boss that if she "wanted a HATCH on her SNATCH she would have to WAX the THATCH or the ZIP might CATCH on the THATCH and leave a RASH on which you can light a MATCH" which i know doesn't rhyme but i was fucked like a whore, then accused her of date raping me when we got back to work...but that was only in jest.
     
     everything else i don't remember. i'm HUMILIATED and EMBARASSED by my behaviour but can now laugh about it.
     
     i don't know what music people at work like apart from don who likes KISS.
   • [22:37 on 22/12/09]
6. • Jack
   • i threw up over a hotel reception I wasnt staying at, got thrown out, fell down a bank and slept in a hedge after a work party a few years ago. Then tried to walk back to work, ended up getting picked up by another guy from work, taken back to the warehouse where i stumbled around drinking coffee covered in hedge and sick.
     
     When I went back to work my boss came in and laughed in my face
   • [22:43 on 22/12/09]
7. • Tim Holehouse
   • Ha ha! you and Don should have got a room...
     
     Yesterday I had a moment shouted at somebody and slamped my fist into the table... never heard the office go so quiet. Got a meeting with my manger today to discuss my anger issues... man I need a break!
   • [08:18 on 23/12/09]
8. • Tim Holehouse
   • Jack Dickinson says:

     i threw up over a hotel reception I wasnt staying at, got thrown out, fell down a bank and slept in a hedge after a work party a few years ago. Then tried to walk back to work, ended up getting picked up by another guy from work, taken back to the warehouse where i stumbled around drinking coffee covered in hedge and sick.
     
     When I went back to work my boss came in and laughed in my face
     
     
     Remember your a womble... Jack's probably one of my favourite drunks... your what I'd describe as a happy drunk.
   • [08:20 on 23/12/09]
9. • Eggy
   • nice one tim, i can't help winding people at work up, their thick as pig shit and equally as gullible, one told me last night i need to take some of that "extra strong stuff" for my cold, i said what this (pointing to the extra strong chewing gum) i led him on to think i'd been taking two pieces of Trebor extra strong chewing gum with a glass of water thinking it would do my cold good, he went of to tell me how chewing gum would do nothing and i needed vitamin c, paracetamol and something else, blah blah blah....
     
     
     Someone else at xmas breakfast wanted to know who chenobyl was, we told he he's a russian footballer signing for man u in january, he also didn't know what two elements make up water.
     
     Just to sum up the people i work with one told us how when he was a kid he set fire to a hay stack, he didn't think it would burn so he lit it with a match and it burned.
   • [12:38 on 23/12/09]

Forums - General Chat - I made a funny...