ninehertz

1. • Pete
   • I got sent two jokes today so I thought I'd share...
     
     
     quote:

     
     A man went to see his doctor.
     
     "You need to stop masturbating," the doctor said.
     
     The man asked, "Why?"
     
     The doctor replied, "Because I'm trying to examine you!"
     
     
     and...
     
     
     quote:

     Bought a house in India the other day..
     
     Mumbai?
     
     No, I did
     
     
     
     
   • [15:48 on 29/09/08]
2. • JenTheHen
   • Q. Why was the cub a spoiled brat?
     
     A. Because his mum PANDA'D to his every whim.
     
     
     
     Thank you, thank you, thank you. You really are too kind!
   • [17:25 on 29/09/08]
3. • Carey
   • pete's first one wins so far. i don't know any jokes but i'll sure as hell judge all yours harshly.
   • [18:54 on 29/09/08]
4. • JenTheHen
   • You're just a fucking panda hater!
     
     PANDA HATER!
     
     
   • [19:13 on 29/09/08]
5. • theadore
   • What's the difference between Amir Khan and a Rustler's burger?
     
     About seven seconds
   • [19:42 on 29/09/08]
6. • Carey
   • JenTheHen says:

     You're just a fucking panda hater!
     
     PANDA HATER!
     
     
     i don't hate them. i just find their lazy ways irritating.
   • [21:28 on 29/09/08]
7. • Tino Insana
   • theadore says:

     What's the difference between Amir Khan and a Rustler's burger?
     
     About seven seconds
     
     
     Good one.
     
     What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
     
     Wiped his arse
   • [15:13 on 30/09/08]
8. • theadore
   • Two mathematicians are just finishing dinner when one starts to complain about a pain. 'Whats the matter?' said the other one.
     
     '(-1 / 64)^1/2' he replied.
     
     
   • [17:33 on 30/09/08]
9. • theadore
   • Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America, uncertainty has now hit Japan. In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches. Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived. Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
   • [12:52 on 01/10/08]
10. • noone
    • 
    • [14:52 on 01/10/08]
11. • mike
    • Martin, I might actually nick that for the Chronicle this week if thats ok, we have a humourous section in there thats almost cheesy enough to get in.
    • [15:06 on 01/10/08]
12. • fred
    • My one joke:
      
      Q: Why don't boxers have sex before a fight?
      
      A: Because they don't like each other.
      
      
    • [22:25 on 01/10/08]
13. • theadore
    • mike says:

      Martin, I might actually nick that for the Chronicle this week if thats ok, we have a humourous section in there thats almost cheesy enough to get in.
      
      
      Sadly i can't take the credit... I would sell my soul to hallmark in seconds.
      
      Whats green and smells like yellow paint?
      
      
      Green Paint.
      [Edited by theadore at 22:46 on 01/10/08]
    • [22:46 on 01/10/08]
14. • mamba
    • theadore says:

      Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America, uncertainty has now hit Japan. In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches. Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived. Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
      
      I was on a course yesterday and the guy taking it used the first part of that joke. We groaned.
    • [12:21 on 02/10/08]

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