ninehertz

“Awright Barry! Ha’s it goin? Mate, you heard that Desert Storm album I was tellin’ you baht?”

“Nah, I ain’t geeza, is it any good? Who are they again?”

“Ah dude, they’re this killer stoner metal band from Oxford – same as dat Winnebago Schpiel and Sexydecimo man, remember them? But they’ve got their ahn thing goin on like! When it kicks off man, it’s like havin’ Clatch right in ya face! Big ol’ riff-os, growlin vocals – he sounds just like Neil Fallan! Proper down n dirty rock man! They’ve even got this chick called Lauren Hayes on the first coupla jams and it just sounds sweet-as – wicked male-ta-female duet over some bitchin’ guit!”

“Sounds bangin’! So it’s just like a dirty-as-funk stoner rock album?”

“Yeah! Well... actually nah! Tha fing ah like most abaht this Forked Tongues CD is that it jus’ keeps changin’ man! I fought same as you, ‘Ah, it’s just another Clatch-wannabe band’, but then if ya keep listenin’, it goes off in laads-a diffrent directions! After a coupla tracks, they go propa metal on ya! There’s a track called “South We Roll” and it’s got this real Southern-grove, like they’ve bin dahn ta New Orleans, seen a loada metal bands, got a dictaphone out n brought it back ta Oxford! Same as on ‘The Jackal’ – it well reminded me of Black Label Society – ya know, that band with Zakk Black from Ozzie’s band!”

“Ah yeah! Love that dude’s riffs! Never knew why he named ‘is band afta a can-a Carling though.”

“Nah, me nighvva mate... But anyway man, this Desert Storm album jus’ got loadsa stuff goin on man. After they’ve done with New Orleans sludgey metal, ya got this rippin’ metal track called “The Void” – sounds even heavier, but with propa soul man, like ‘Planet Caravan’ by Sabbaff – his voice just hits ya there in the gut where ya least expect it, and there’s all this mellow bluesy guitar goin’ on before they hit ya again with some badass chunky bass groves n that. Afta all that, ah were expectin’ like a grand-slam finish ta the album – propa stormin’ to the end like!”

“And weren’t it?!”

“Mate, at the end it’s jus’ like ur sat rahnd a campfire with em! They really bring it back dahn to base! It’s just them and some acoustics, singin away, sounds propa cool – really slow n chills you out. It’s like they’re like, ‘Yeah, we can be a metal band, but we also knah good blues n that’. It’s like when you were a kid on scout-camp and some duffer would ‘ave a guitar and you’d sit around singin’ some dirty tunes! So yeah, it’s a really good album, there’s loadsa stuff to enjoy at diffrent times!”

“Cool cool! I like tha sounda tha Black Table Society, plus soulful chicks n dirty acoustic a lot! Reckon ah might get that one – what they called again, Desert Sessions?!”

“Nah, Desert Storm, ya mappet!!!”